We all feel nervous from time to time. But when these feelings start becoming recurring patterns of continuous worry, overthinking, or concern for the future, it may be a sign of deeper problems. People with anxious personality traits repeatedly fall unknowingly into certain behaviors that can intensify anxiety and make it harder to be connected, safe, or well emotionally.
Knowing about the typical behaviors of a person with an anxious personality will help you see the similar patterns in your own daily life and take action to manage them in a better way. The following five behaviors may appear innocent at first sight, but they might actually be the reason you are trapped in an anxiety spiral.
1. Overanalyzing Everything
One of the most typical anxious personality traits is a gesture of overanalysis. Rephrasing conversations, scrutinizing text messages, or gnawing over what a person “actually meant” are all symptoms of being an over-thinker.
Those who are prone to anxiety often believe in their ability to solve or escape pain in the future if they think about it a lot. But this practice can cause hesitation, mental tiredness, and negate one’s ability to take action.
What you can do:
- Get used to setting a time to brood in your mind.
- Write down, to keep the thoughts out of your head.
- Convict yourself that vagueness is not a hazard but a certainty part of life.
2. Looking for Confirmation Always
Repetitive search for reassurance is among the manifestations of anxiousness. It doesn’t matter if an individual goes the usual way of repeating the same question to family members, asking for the hundredth time whether something is done yet at work, or looking for health-related information on the internet, the result is the same – the person is trying to reduce fear or gain certainty.
While it may seem to be a quick and effective way to feel better about the situation or oneself, in reality, the practice only reinforces the belief that one’s own intuition and experience are not enough and, therefore, lead to a constant need for constant external confirmation.
What can be done:
- Postpone the search for reassurance and suffer through negative feelings for a while.
- Take note of regularities, e.g. do you always go to the same person or do the same action?
- Start by trusting your judgment little by little.
3. People-Pleasing at the Expense of Yourself
The fear of not being loved, the fear of being excluded, or the fear of being perceived as “too much” are just examples of the anxiously spirited who can make peace with these uncertainties by drawing on the people-pleasing strategy. In short, by pleasing others, they create a “yes-yes” culture, they avoid saying no, they simply keep the peace, or they withdraw their needs.
While it momentarily satisfies the person’s need to avoid the discomfort of the moment, over time, people-pleasing results in bitterness, being worn out, and the progression of self-uncertainty.
What you can do:
- Begin with something small: Decelerate – deny any offer in less trying circumstances.
- Question yourself: “Am I compelled by conscience or am I really me?”,
- Observe your personal desires and then evaluate their relation to the requests you have been given by others.
4. Avoiding Uncomfortable Situations
Anxiousness is identified by evading something, be it a social meeting or a crucial assignment and, thus, individuals with these types of personalities are generally more bothersome to themselves when they plan to avoid painful feelings. Nonetheless, only by confronting the triggers to their anxiety do anxious personalities break this pattern.
Every time you opt-out of an undesirable act, you forgo the chance to build your character and disprove projections of fear.
What you can do:
- Gradually expose yourself to what you fear in small steps.
- Celebrate every action, no matter how small.
- Focus on the outcome: How did you feel after facing it?
5. Catastrophizing Future Scenarios
Do you often go to the worst-case scenario in your mind? This is yet another habit that is closely monitored by afraid personality traits. When this occurs, it can be visualized as the victim being fired from work after one single critique, or it can also be likened to the mere sensing of a symptom of a disease making it seem as though it is a terminal ailment.
Catastrophizing keeps your nervous system on high alert and makes even small stressors feel overwhelming.
What you can do:
- Ask yourself: “What’s the most likely outcome?”
- Write out a realistic scenario versus the feared one.
- Practice grounding techniques to stay in the present.
Final Thoughts: Awareness is the First Step
If you found that you exhibit one or more of the described habits, don’t worry. You are on the same path with those who have the same problems. These habits are signs of anxiety and coping with them is already a step in the right direction.
The hardest part is noticing the habits without being judgmental. You can then begin to replace the negative habits with some healthy coping strategies that will balance your emotional state, make you more resilient, and give you the self-esteem support you need.
If anxiety becomes unbearable, one should seek the assistance of a professional in the mental health field as it can be life-changing, and an individual can start the journey by understanding his/her patterns.